Conservatives don’t actually get the tech they’re regulating. But you knew this already, right?

I’ll be the first to say there’s a few things the conservatives have done that I openly agree with–immigration reform, anyone? But there’s an equal number, at least, that make me wanna scratch my head. Or beat someone else’s. The copyright bill up here has pretty much already been dealt with, but I still find it interesting that not very many people picked up on parliamentary secretary Dean Del Mastro’s complete and utter technostupidity. According to him, and presumedly most of the rest of the party (Tony Clement used to be against it, as did James Moore–probably why they suddenly don’t have a whole lot to do with this bill now), buying a CD with the intention of putting it on your iPod or other such technothinggy is the equivalent of buying socks and intending to steal shoes.

It’s like going to a clothing store and buying a pair of socks, and going back and saying ‘By the way, it wasn’t socks I needed, what I really wanted was shoes, so I’m just going to take these — I’m going to ‘format shift’ from socks to shoes — and I’m not going to pay anything because it was all for my feet.'”

I can’t even wrap my head around where a comparison like that even comes into play. That would be like going into a store, buying a Celine Dion CD (I know, I know, but bare with me), then going back and saying “I actually wanted the titanic movie, so excuse me. I’ll just walk off with it.”. Except, uh, no one’s saying that either. It’s like I’ve been saying for ever, and ever, and ever, and ever. You buy a thing once. It’s yours to do with as you please, or so the rule’s supposed to go. That can and should include backing it up on your computer. Or putting it on your iThing so you’re not hauling the CD with you to and from work. Or, hell, copying it to another CD for those people who still insist on hauling the CD back and forth to work–so you don’t, you know, go and lose the original. In dean del Mastroland, that’s exactly like walking out with the titanic movie for the price of a Celine CD. Which is exactly what no one, legally or otherwise, is trying to do here. Ah, but you don’t get to play spokesman for a bill like this if you can actually, you know, use your head.

Related: I wonder how many songs dean Del Mastro’s iPod or equivalent has that maybe he aught not to, by his own logic. Just sayin’.