Things I will always miss about tech support, number 98562.

We didn’t get many calls like this, but when we did, they were the source of many hours of amusement. This punked from a tech support community on LJ I’ve been stalking since my Dell days.

ME: Thank you for calling the support desk. This is ____. May I have your login ID, please?

THEM: (Series of beeps as they punch it into the phone)

ME: Please speak the login ID.

THEM: Wow. You’re well programmed, aren’t you?

ME: I’m sorry, I didn’t understand that. What was the login ID?

THEM: _____.

ME: Thank you. Could you please speak your first and last name?

THEM: ____ _____.

ME: Cool. How can we help you today?

THEM: Did you just say ‘cool’?

ME: Yeah.

THEM: You’re not the computer, are you?

ME: Nope.

THEM: You probably think I’m an idiot, don’t you?

ME: For the purposes of quality control, this call may be monitored.

THEM: Is that a polite way of saying ‘yes’?

ME: Bwa ha ha, and all that.

I love my job. And my former job. And any future jobs. Bwa ha ha, and all that.

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