I’m… too ‘Sexy’ for my name.

People who decide they absolutely despise their given ame aren’t exactly uncommon. Hell, people who decide to do something about it are equally not entirely all that uncommon. But some of the choices folks will come up with kind of makes you wish it were. Take Sheila, for instance. She absolutely hates her name. She’s going to court to have it changed. Her preferred one? Sexy.

“I wear Victoria’s Secret clothes all the time,” she said. “I was like, ‘Shoot, I’ll just go for Sexy.”

If that doesn’t work?

“If it’s not Sexy … then I might go for Sparkle,” Crabtree said.

And that right there is what’s wrong with the world today, kids. When you’re 15-year-old daughter, who you’d expect to be the more likely source of an idea like that, comes out and says she doesn’t have a clue what the problem is, you know someone’s taken a left turn at loony. Oh, and just in case you thought there might have been some hope for salvaging the situation… nope.

An Ohio lady legally changed her name from Sheila to Sexy in court just after 10 a.m. Tuesday.

“That was the last piece I needed for my life to feel complete, kind of like a puzzle,” Sexy Ranea Crabtree told the Daily News. “That’s all I needed, to get rid of that ugly name — thankfully I’m rid of it for good!”

The world just got a little bit more braindead. Is it too late to get off?

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