Sadly, someone out there probably just bought this email.

Equally sadly, whoever created it is probably hoping some stupid sysadmin will get a hold of it and actually believe it. Surprisingly, there are sysadmins out there who’re that stupid–I did tech support for a few of them.

From: spam@email.address.removed
Date: Sat 02/01/2010 10:01 AM
To: my@email.address.removed
Subject: WEBMAIL UPGRADE


Dear Webmail User,
We are really sorry for the inconvenience we are making you pass through,we are having problem with our database due to our recent upgrade and we can not find your data. Please we need to rectify this problem before the next 24-hours if not, you may not be able to send or receive email with your e-mail address.

Please provide your account details below so we can rectify this problem as soon as possible:
USER NAME:
PASSWORD:
COUNTRY:
NOTE: Your data and information will not be tampered or interfered with, We’ll just record your data back into our database and send you a new confirmation alphanumerical password that will only be valid during this period and can be changed after this process.
Please respond to this notice to enable us provide you better online services.

Dear spamvertising asshole. I don’t use webmail except in emergencies. And my provider, when it works, actually has a clue. And can form proper english sentences. Please do you and me a favour and die in a grease fire. No love, a very unimpressed geek.

PS: You fail epically at life. Computer user’s license revoked.

2 comments
  1. Dunno, maybe you should forward that to whatever company they’re claiming to be (if you haven’t already). Does Canada have an equivalent to the FCC? Maybe you could forward it there as well. Dunno if it do much good, but just let them know there’s a problem.

    Personally, I really, REALLY fucking hate people who make a living doing shit like that. Frauds, cheats, liars, I hate them! Everyone from the “Will Work For Food” guy who’s just too lazy to work to the bigass corporate executive who told his employee, “Hey, buy our stock!” all the while selling his.

    It’s complicated, but it boils down to this. I worked for a guy for a month a half and I only got paid $100. I was desperate and he royally fucked me, and I found out later I’m wasn’t the first one.

    So, people like that can DIE as far as I’m concerned.

    1. We do have the CRTC, AKA Canadian Radio and Telecommunications Commission, but they’re about as much a joke as you’ll see without paying admission to a comedy club. Plus, if it’s not coming from somewhere *in* Canada, there’s not a whole lot they can do about it. And since certain countries (China, anyone?) have no problem allowing this kinda thing to happen, forwarding it to the actual owner of the address will probably result in a generous helping of laughing someone’s ass off. Besides, then who would I mock?

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